I got scammed out of 20K.
They got me hook, line and sinker.
More about that in a minute…
I hope that the first part of the year has treated you well!
My wife and I celebrated Valentine’s Day this year.
We kept it low key. Went out to a nice dinner and then came home and played Gin Rummy.
I hate Gin Rummy.
I’m terrible at it and she destroyed me every single game.
Regardless, the night was full of witty banter, trash talk and laughs.
Despite me losing every single game by a mile, I still had a blast with her.
Reflecting back on nights like these, I’ve come to realize it’s about presence.
Being in the moment. Not on your phone, not doing something else, simply just engaging with one another.
Being in love is work.
It takes effort to have a fulfilling relationship.
It’s easy to get into a groove or a rut and keep doing the same things over and over again.
We are creatures of habit after all, so it's an uphill battle.
How do you have a fulfilling relationship?
You'd think the answer is LOVE. I think that's the beginning.
GAINING CLARITY and COMMUNICATION is how you keep it from dying.
I failed at these things in my first marriage.
Your spouse/significant other is not a mind reader. If a need of yours is not being met, communicating with kind candor goes a long way.
On the flip side, asking them what they need or asking them what I can do better to make her feel loved also goes a long way.
It’s a great gut check to make sure we are on the same page in life, and that I’m loving her the way SHE needs/desires/wants to be loved.
I do find that clear, constant communication keeps small things from building up that end up in big, explosive arguments. (Which I hate)
Which brings me to my next point…
Navigating the emotional minefield.
Inside us all lies our primitive brain/reptile brain/lizard brain, what ever you want to call it.
It’s our gut reaction that happens if the logical side of your brain doesn’t kick in to stop from saying/doing something irrational.
And just like a landmine, there are “triggers” that will set it off.
Some of these mines? They are in plain site. These are the ones that you see on the news.
Others are buried deep. Usually from emotional trauma somewhere in life.
And still some start deeper, but eventually make it to the surface and then become easy to trigger. Things like, if your significant other doesn’t ever make the bed and this really bothers you. And even if you address it, they still don’t do it so it builds and builds and builds and then … BOOM. (Usually along with other triggers)
What do you do?
Realize that the majority of these are based on fear. Fear of loss, fear of the unknown, fear of death, fear of embarrassment, fear of change, etc.
Someone once told me that fear was simply… FALSE EMOTIONS APPEARING REAL.
F.E.A.R.
That made sense to me.
Let's not forget that some triggers are based on anger. And when someone is angry, lizard brain kicks in, and reason/logic go out the window.
Now is not the time to talk. It’s time to listen. Not just to what they are saying, but what’s really behind what they are saying.
Typically it’s a much deeper issue. This current argument happens to be the valve to let off steam, and oftentimes the issue at hand is a small part of a bigger thing.
What to do comes down to clarity and communication.
BUT… timing is key here.
When the lizard brain has taken over, having a logical conversation is extremely difficult. This is where listening, hearing them out, and trying not to FIX it comes into play. (I’m a problem solver and fixer by nature so this is not an easy thing to do)
Try to see things from their perspective and be a sounding board. Now the hard part… you have to keep your ego/pride in check. Lower your own guard whether you are right or wrong. And hear them out.
Easy to say, HARD to do.
Come from a place of understanding because if you also come from a place of anger, nothing gets accomplished.
I would rather be HAPPY than right. For some reason, ego/pride seems to get the better of people.
Now, this brings me to my next story… How I got scammed out of 20K.
Last Monday, I was lifting weights and I got a phone call from the Hamilton County Sheriff’s Dept. My son was traveling, so instantly I thought something happened. Turns out, it was because I had missed… Jury Duty?
A Sergeant Micheal Hall said that I missed jury duty and I told him that no, I called the courthouse and they said they had it covered.
He quickly replies with… This is in regards to a federal case, not local. And that someone at my address signed for it. I said I didn’t sign for it and they proceeded to tell me that they need to do a signature check to prove that at the Sheriff’s office.
He then texts me 3 “official” documents that he made me read out loud to him so that I understood. One document was a warrant out for my arrest, and the other was the 3 citations that was given to me. And how I had to pay 10% of each citation (which ended up being 7500 per citation) I had to pay this amount to basically be allowed to enter the sheriff’s office and not get arrested.
The judge would give me a document that says not to arrest me even though I have a warrant for my arrest.
After reading these documents out loud, it bypassed my BS filter and I went right into my lizard brain. FEAR.
I didn’t want to go to jail, and I didn’t want my name and reputation tarnished. I work very hard to do the right things, be an upstanding citizen and be the best person I can be.
Next, they told me that they could not let me off the phone so I didn’t “run” because of the warrant.
They texted me another “Official” Covid 19 document on how they can only accept digital currency because of a law passed and then a bitcoin payment link was sent. (Another red flag that I didn’t catch because I was in Lizard brain)
I was transferred from Sergeant Hall to Captain Davenport and for the next 4 hours, I went from the bank to the Bitcoin ATM machine putting money into this machine. All while staying on the phone with them.
I was texting my wife complaining about how long this was taking (since I couldn’t call because I was on the phone with “Captain Davenport” And she used AI and found out that this was a scam.
They told me I had a “zoom” call with the judge who would issue me the document voiding the warrant so I could do this signature test at the sheriff’s office. So this judge calls me, but it wasn’t the judge… it was a US marshal BEFORE I got to talk to the judge.
At this point, I was like, ok this is a scam. And I hung up.
I tried to get the 20K back, but it was in a bitcoin wallet that I didn’t own.
THEY GOT ME.
Tapped right into my fear, bypassed my filters and put me in total LIZARD BRAIN.
After writing this all out, this does seem like it’s an easy to spot scam lol. THAT IS MY POINT.
What’s obvious, quickly became unobvious and made me do something that I would never fall for.
Needless to say after all this, I was PISSSSSEEEDDD. Mad at them for taking advantage of me, and frustrated with myself for falling for it.
In moments like these, I allow myself 20 minutes to sulk, and focus on loss. Then I go back to focusing on gain and abundance and gratitude for my life. I will not allow it to take any more mindshare than it already did.
To sum this entire message up, I guess I wanted to show you the power of the lizard brain. We’re all susceptible to it.
The ones who have figured out how to manage this part of your brain? They will have peace of mind…making your relationships, yourself, and what happens to you easier to navigate.
Now. Take all of this with a grain of salt. I’m not going to pretend I know everything. This is just what I’ve personally discovered fumbling through life lol. Hopefully you’ve found something in it to be helpful to you.
We learn from each other, right?
What’s going on in Lifeboost right now?
MINDFLOW! We’ve sold out of the first batch. So far, people seem to be getting positive results and they have been enjoying it. This makes my heart happy. I formulated this myself and to perfect it took over a year and We’ll still be constantly improving it just like we do with everything else.
With that being said, a couple things… Mindflow is an instant coffee. You simply put a tablespoon into hot or cold water and stir. Ideally with a frother.
That’s it. There is no brewing like our whole bean or ground coffees.
You can also take a tablespoon and put it in your coffee. Think of it like putting a shot of espresso into your coffee or what they call a “red eye” at cafes.
NESPRESSO PODS are finally out!
My team and I have been testing these and they turned out spectacular. If you have a Nespresso machine, give these a shot. Would love your feedback on them.
We will also be bringing out some new flavors this year as well as some other new products. Stay tuned.
You’ll also be noticing some changes in our website soon. We’ve been looking through all of your feedback and working to give a better experience on the website.
Finally, we're running a big sale on our flavored decaf. Bet you didn't know we had flavored decaf lol.
When we send promotional emails for our flavored coffees, we almost always get people asking if we have this in a decaf version.
We listened and started to create a flavored decaf coffee line. I'm not a decaf drinker personally, but I do know that these guys get the short end of the stick when it comes to coffee.
Even without caffeine, coffee is full of anti-oxidants and helpful compounds.
A premium, low acid, swiss water processed decaf that is flavored with plant extracts does not exist as far as I know, so we created it.
You can check out the sale here.
